Employing The Unemployed

The homeless man who had more integrity than corporate America...

"Will Work 4 Food", "Please help, homeless vet needs food". We've all seen signs like this from people on the streets looking for our hand outs. Not too long ago, I was living in San Francisco. The first day I get to the city, I see a man on the corner holding a sign that read "Need Money For A Hooker, too ugly to get laid without one" I laughed when I saw this. I actually gave the man $5.00. I didn't give him the $5.00 to get a hooker, but I gave it to him because he was honest. Does it pay to be honest in today's world? It did for this guy.

       Being unemployed is crazy, isn't it? If you're like me and somehow we let our careers define who we are and we're unemployed we feel like no one. I was talking with a friend the other day and he said "Nikki, your work doesn't define who you are, but it defines a part of what you do." I found this so interesting. When I was working, people would ask "who are you?" And I would tell them "I'm a major market on air personality" (because that WAS my job). Not once did I ever answer who I was..I always answered what I did. Interesting to think about that now. If someone were to ask me who I was today would I reply "unemployed"? I don't think so, I think I would reply "I'm currently working towards my Masters in Psychology" (since that's what I'm doing now). Funny how we identify who we are by only the good things we accomplish in life. I guess no one wants to hear the bad stuff...

      This brings me to being unemployed. Since when does being "unemployed" make you less desirable for companies to hire? Statistics show; you're worth more money to another company when you're employed looking for another job. Really? You mean to tell me, I'm worth more money to another company if I'm seeking other employment at the same time I'm employed? Hmmmm, where's the logic in that? What I'm hearing is, it's okay to be disloyal to the company who is paying me? I'm not sure I'd want to work  for a company who thinks that's okay to do while I'm employed by someone else.

Looks like the homeless man I saw in San Francisco holding the "hooker" sign has more honesty than corporate America.

Since money is extremely scarce now, I'm thankful I've saved most of my receipts from things I was bale to afford in the past. It seems now my savings plan consists of returning items to the store so I can get enough cash for food and gas. It's a shame to be living in such a free world which doesn't allow us to be free to choose what direction we can go in life. I've applied at certain jobs which were way  below my educational level and experience only to find out, I was "too over qualified" for the position. I have some advice for companies, if you're looking to hire the best; now is the time. Some of the best qualified people are out of work now, and take it from me...we're on Sale

Until Next Time, Much Love, Nikki

Relationships Are Like Our Kitchen

Relationships ARE like our kitchen. Depending on how your kitchen is laid out can say a lot about how you view your relationships in life. Think about it for a minute. We all have cabinets, we all put certain things in their certain places and we know they're there if we need to use them. How does this all play a part within our relationships? Well, if you have a scattered kitchen and things aren't placed in their perspective places we get lost trying to find them.

In our minds we do the same thing in relationships. We meet someone and we put them in "our cabinet" we compartmentalize them. We ask ourselves questions about the other person. Do I like this person? Is he/she just a friend? Are they a potential lover? Are they someone I want to have a long lasting relationship with? Or is this person just someone who passed through my life? Does that passage have a meaning? When we decide on these factors we put them into a category... or a cabinet. If we like this person as a friend, we put them into the "friends category" (something like where we would store our mixer) because we don't use it every day. If this same person is thought to be a potential lover, we may put them into the "coffee" canister, something most of us access every day.

The question comes to mind of "What if I'm  not sure where to put them?" Then this is where your kitchen gets cluttered...this is where we put our mail...on the counter until we decide what to do with it. We all have departments of our compartments but how we manage those compartments is what defines how we mange our relationships. 




Until Next Time,
Much Love,
Nikki

The Educated Ego

     With unemployment being so high these days it's important to "sell" ourselves to the potential employer. We're all in this game called "Life". It's been 4 months since I've been able to land a gig in radio. It's not because I'm too picky on where I want to work, but it may be due to the way I thought I had to "sell" myself to the potential employer.

     During the interview process we all get asked the same dreaded question of "Tell me about yourself".  I'm a firm believer not too  many people like to talk about themselves...unless they have a big ego. Today, I was proposed a question about the ego and being in the radio business versus being in the corporate world.  I was on Facebook and a friend asked me this question : ""Nikki, why is it in radio when you're confident you're considered having an ego, and in the corporate world having confidence means you're educated?" My reply? Interesting concept, I'll go ask the panel." So, I asked "the panel" on Facebook. 


Here's what "the panel" had to say...with their permission.


 - "It depends on HOW the confidence is displayed. Many times EGO is misread as confidence."

 - "But in this business, if you are good, you have to have some ego, confidence. With out it, you are just average. So, I am an educated radio personality... call it what you want, just be great at it."

- "There is a difference between ego and arrogance WITH ego. There is no room for a diva in any business..... and most divas DON'T have the talent to back it up. :)"

 - "Doing a great job every day, and being confident in doing it, nothing wrong with that. While some may see that as an EGO thing, it's really more about what you see when the mirror reflects you back. I think the ego part may come in when you have air talent that always TELLS you how confident they are. When that happens, you have to wonder if maybe they're not all that confident or talented to begin with." 

      Then my reply came: "I'm lucky enough I've never been told I was a Diva or I had an ego. The problem is when PD's automatically think you have an ego because a) you're from a major market or b) you're good on the air. I had a PD once tell me "here we all leave... our ego's at the door." I was like "ok" but then I thought to myself what she was actually saying was "I know you think you're all that because you're from a major market but...I really don't want to invest my time with you, or I don't know how to make you better". I think I'm educated enough to know the difference between real PD's and those who fake it to keep their jobs. The one's who fake it never make a decision and they pass the buck. The one's who make it, take chances and help mold the air talent. So far, I've been lucky enough to be surrounded by great PD's who helped shape the air talent I am today. I didn't get this way alone. Does this make me egotistical or confident in my talent?"

      The next person continued in the thread by saying : 

- "That makes you confident in your talent. And that's a very good thing."

- "Having confidence is not the same as having an ego (they are not exclusive of each other). Having an ego (huge one that people talk negatively about) comes across as being a "Diva". Thinking, or in the case of radio, talking about yoursel...f all the time (as though the world revolves around you, and only you). Being confident just means you know what you are doing, know you can do the job, and know you can do it right. Sometimes confidence is misplaced, just as a huge ego can be misplaced, in that regard they are equal.

Does this answer your question?"

     Then I reply: "Yes. I see your point and I agree with you. How would you approach a situation (and this could help others too when applying for a job). How would you approach a situation where the interviewer asks the "horrible" question of "So tell me about yourself" ? I think sometimes in radio when we DO, do that it may come across egotistical. Any suggestions on how to answer this without sounding egotistical?"

     Then another person chimed in: "Nikki, somehow your response isn't showing (but I did get the email with your question). When in an interview, you can be confident in your abilities, but to keep the ego in check by admitting you can't do it all on your own. All the people in the background, that listeners never know about, help too. Talk about how you listen to others, incorporating their good ideas into your show, etc. That way you come across as confident, but not egotistical."

Then lastly: "Listening! What a great concept that so many have forgotten."

      So, after reading everyone's comments, it led me to believe there is actually a difference in being educated and having an ego. If you're smart you'll know how to use your ego  to make it look like you don't have one. If all you have is an ego then chances are, that's the only thing you have to bring to the table for a potential employer. Anyone with a healthy ego knows, ego's can be lifted, created, shattered and nurtured.

     When is it okay to display your ego? When do we say, "hey, I AM good enough for this position so why not hire ME"? Do we ever have that right to say that, do we even dare to say that? What if it's your confidence speaking out loud and NOT your ego?

The way potential employers see us depends on how educated our ego has become.



Until Next Time,
Much Love,
Nikki